View Full Version : Is it okay to hire your husband/wife/spouse?

02-25-2014, 09:51 AM
In many buisness' it is thought to be unappropriate to hire your significant other. Or to work with them o the same shift. Employees may feel that you are favoring them and they might be getting paid more etc. Not only that but some employees may feel like they can do whatever they want and you will not fire him or her because it is your wife/husband.

02-25-2014, 12:16 PM
This has been asked before on this forum. A lot of people don't like to hire their family because of the emotional connection.
I would also be very careful about this.

02-25-2014, 03:52 PM
If they are qualified and you can trust them to be professional I say go for it. You have to be very certain that the personal and professional spheres stay completely separated. If you are confident that this won't be a problem, then it's not a bad idea.

02-25-2014, 04:59 PM
I think if the person is qualified and MOTIVATED enough to work with you and at your goals then yes! It can be a really wonderful partnership and can advance your company further. But it can go a different route as well.

02-25-2014, 09:01 PM
It's actually not so uncommon though. You know how some couples share the same love or interest on something, so they start a small business relating to their passion. In cases like this, it's not exactly considered "hiring" your significant other, because he or she is most likely not even an official employee that is bounded by a contract or rules that you must follow. He or she is someone who is "just there" to help with the business, employees got paid for what they do, but this fella most likely didn't even receive a salary. Or some considered them a "second boss". They share the same position as the boss, and the boss's money is his/her money as well.

02-26-2014, 09:50 AM
In my opinion my spouse would be working harder than anyone else as he would have the same interest as myself and this business would be more important to him than most any other employees just because it is personal.

There may be issues as far as other employees feeling that he stepped in above them, however if he was right for the part I hired him for I would be ok with that! It would be the same as if I hired someone else to step up above the other employees.

I try my best to treat everyone fairly so as long as it was fair I would not have a problem with it at all!

02-26-2014, 10:18 AM
It would probably be better if you did not hire your spouse/significant other and there are many reasons why. One is that if your spouse is really looking for career or professional growth, you might be lenient and not be strict enough for him to be able to develop himself. He might ask for the easy way out and not give 100% in comparison to if he worked for another company. There is a tendency that if you hire someone you know for your business, you might even be shy or embarrassed to ask him to do something or correct him if something is not right. If worst comes to worst, he might feel a sense of entitlement or your other employees might feel intimidated by the presence of your spouse, even their work could be affected.

02-26-2014, 10:23 AM
It depends if you can work well with them or not. For example I work with my sister and she's great to have for a partner. We both know our strength and weaknesses. But in some cases, it might not be productive. You just need to ask yourself how productive will it be if you work together by both your personalities etc.

02-26-2014, 11:14 AM
I don't see why it wouldn't be okay. As long as you aren't discriminating other employees, you can always hire a relative. A family business is always a great way of making some money.

02-26-2014, 02:40 PM
Let's say for example if they are not working hard enough would you pay them the same as any other employee that is working really hard to keep his job?

You would because they are your siblings. I think that is the only problem with this, you pay them a lot of money and they don't work hard enough.

02-26-2014, 03:13 PM
I dont understand when people work with their spouses, I feel like its way too much time together. Our real estate team are a married couple and though one might assume they like to work together they have this weird passive-aggressive attitude towards each other that makes you uncomfortable. I really believe its because they work together, commute together and live together. Its too much. I might sound negative here but I really don't think its the best to work with a spouse.

02-26-2014, 04:14 PM
I dont understand when people work with their spouses, I feel like its way too much time together. Our real estate team are a married couple and though one might assume they like to work together they have this weird passive-aggressive attitude towards each other that makes you uncomfortable. I really believe its because they work together, commute together and live together. Its too much. I might sound negative here but I really don't think its the best to work with a spouse.

Its a personal thing I guess. Some people jsut function better with time apart and others just love each other and improve their business even more if they are together.

02-27-2014, 07:17 PM
As long as it's for the right reasons (they actually want to work and not rip you off) and the relationship is secure and stable.

02-28-2014, 02:18 AM
Yes, I would do it in a heartbeat if she were qualified for the job. The rest of the employees can sulk all they want, but it's my company and I will do whatever I want in it and if it fails then it will be my fault and no one else's. If it proves to be problematic, however, I would also be open to reconsideration. I think it's possible for these things to work out as evidenced in many family owned businesses in restaurants, you just have to be level headed enough to prioritize certain things and not letting emotions get in the way.

02-28-2014, 09:35 AM
No matter how objective you think you are, you can not be objective enough when it comes to having a professional business relationship with someone that close to you. And even if you think you're doing great in separating your personal affairs from you business ones, you might find that your significant other feels differently. If you want to start a family business, to have your husband/wife as an equal partner, I think that's ok. But otherwise, I would recommend you don't employ your family.

02-28-2014, 09:49 AM
Yeah i agree you should never work with family, unless you have to. Family, and business do not mix. Eventually family issues will start spilling over into the business aspect, and that is where things will get messy. You do not want a family issue destroying your business. It is simply not worth it.

02-28-2014, 03:18 PM
Yeah, I agree. I do not think hiring your spouse would be a good idea, or any relatives for that matter. It's very difficult to differentiate between personal transactions and business transactions and there will always be a discomfort in crossing the line between the two. If you are too business-like in transacting with your relatives, it might cause personal dislike. If you are being nice personally, it may end up to be unfair for the other people.

02-28-2014, 05:43 PM
This could easily be construed as nepotism, so if you do decide to do this, you'd need to be sure that all your current employees understand and support the decision---and if they don't, that you're prepared to fire them for it. Resentment grows stronger more often than not, and you can expect that any employee who thinks hiring family in is a bad move will still think so six months from now. Tread lightly!

03-02-2014, 01:23 AM
No. and a Firm No.

I have seen relations get destroyed when people of a family work at the same place. There are many times when you have to be tough for the good of the Organization or Business and when it concerns your family members, it definitely makes things more complicated. A similar reasoning is also seen with Doctors and Surgeons - they do not normally treat their family members.

03-02-2014, 12:17 PM
If it is a Mom and Pop operation then I expect both to be working. In most cases the resentment of other employees over favoritism (real or imagined) is an issue that needs to be dealt with. Personally, I think it is perfectly OK for two people to work at the same place as long as they are not making hiring/firing/wage decisions about each other.
You phrased the question is it OK to hire... in that case no. I assume that one partner is working for a company already and is part of the hiring process in which case an unbiased hiring can not happen.

03-02-2014, 02:17 PM
It depends on the people because if they are mature enough to leave their issues and personal stuff at home and don't bring it to their work place then I don't see a problem. Business is suppose to be treated differently when at it. Emotions has to be forgotten at that moment. But there is advantages of having family working with you and that is the support you can get.

03-03-2014, 08:36 AM
This is certainly not for everyone. There is too much emotional connection involved to be able to separate personal and work life just like that. Of course there are people who could make it, but I personally would not recommend it. It is harder to appear professional in the workplace when your colleague is your spouse; other co-workers would not perceive it in the same way. Unless the spouse will be working in a different department and do not interact on daily basis, it might be a good idea to just avoid hiring a spouse.

03-03-2014, 09:29 AM
Actually your spouse or your partner is always part of your business no matter what you do specially when you guys believe in equality. A few people discourage and don't do this, the Muslims and the Chinese, that's because for them Business and Wives don't mix. Although there are some who actually allow their wives to be part of the business. That depends on the person entirely.

03-03-2014, 01:00 PM
It's difficult to imagine how you would react in such a situation if you have no way of actually testing you hypothesis. To make it easier though, imagine a situation in which your spouse is not performing at the job and you have to include him/her in an action plan in order to achieve better results. How would you explain to him/her the situation? Would you be able to be as strict as the situation requires? Would you be able to provide constructive feedback? How would you feel if you would be on the other side of the line? Knowing that you are not as good as maybe someone else is, how everybody would treat you just because you're the boss's husband/wife? There are many implications that you might not be aware of.